Hello Again!
Hey everyone! I'm sorry it's been so long since my last post. I have had a full couple of weeks and was unable to post the last two Tuesdays. I got a new computer, so even though I was planning to post yesterday I couldn't because I couldn't get back into my google account! After a lot of work and some help from my advisor I'm finally in, so here we are on Wednesday and I'm finally posting about something that happened about a month ago. Isn't it funny how life works? :)
Valley Fair Day
Apparently, my grandpa loves roller coasters. I guess I was surprised by this? I don't know why but somehow I never thought about older people enjoying thrills like roller coasters. I personally have been very traumatized a time or two, but it's kind of fun. Somehow. I really can't explain how I feel about those rides, it's a love/hate thing.
Anyway, because my grandpa wanted to go, my mom planned a day at Valley Fair for her, my aunt, my sister, my grandpa, and me.
Oh it was loads of fun, so much in fact that I was sure I had gained five pounds by the end of the day. (but hey, what's a trip to valley fair without deep fried oreos and over-sized turkey legs wrapped in bacon??)
We walked by the karaoke area several times. I always walked a little extra fast. In all the years I've been at Valley Fair I've weaseled my way out of singing there. There was a little difference in the fact that my grandfather had joined us this time... Every time we went by, there was usually someone singing who...well.... shouldn't be singing. But hey, karaoke is something you don't have to be good for, I'm not judging.
And then it happened...
"Oh Arianna you've got to save our ears!" my mother had started her pushing and prodding shorty after we sat down to eat unfortunately close to the karaoke stage. I had said no over and over again but you know how mothers are.... the my grandpa chimed in, saying he'd like it very much if I would sing for him. "Ughhhhh" was all I could think. I did not want to do this. I knew it would sound awful. I had been eating junk food and screaming my lungs out all day. This wasn't the ideal time to go up and sing... at all.
When I finally consented, it was for the sake that my grandfather would have some good memories, because this was possibly the last time he would ever go to Valley Fair. We looked through songs for almost 45 minutes! I couldn't decide, and I sat there getting more and more upset about the whole thing. We finally settled on "My Heart Will Go On" from Titanic. That's a hard song, and even harder when your voice box has been screaming all day...
And I Killed It, literally...
Oh was it not perfect. I was shaking. My voice cracked near the beginning even though I was trying with all my might to keep my cool, to think about how this wasn't even supposed to be a big deal, to imagine I was Rose singing for everything I felt after loosing Jack. Nothing fixed it, but I did it anyway. I made it through, I sang my very best, and I did it.
Believe it or Not, I Learned Something from Michael Jordan.
I knew it wouldn't be good. I knew I wouldn't have a moment like Gabriella in High School Musical when she was forced into karaoke and the movie-moment happened and she rocked it. I so badly wanted a move-moment. Those moments that feel out of a story-book. "She was so scared, but she did it, and she blew everyone away." that's what I wanted to be able to tell my blog followers, and that's what I wanted to be able to remember, to remind myself of as I continued through this music journey; but of course, I was disappointed.
As I thought about it for the next few days, I realized that it was okay. Yes, it wasn't perfect, but I knew it wouldn't be. That's why I didn't want to do it, right? Well I have news for you. That was a really bad reason.
I'm not much of a sports fan, and I never expected to learn anything from a basketball player, but this quote from Michael Jordan says everything I learned from this whole experience.
Our lives aren't from a movie. My life will never go like a perfect story book. I will never be good on stage until I'm brave enough to go through being bad first. This is possibly one of the most important lessons I could've learned as I'm becoming more and more of a musician, so I had to share it with all of you. I want to remind you, and I will constantly remind you, because it's one of my very favorite things to say... Life doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful. In fact, it's those beautiful imperfections that make it unique, that make it your very own story, that make it so special. We certainly aren't perfect, but in God's eyes, we are SO beautiful.
It is my goal to remember that through Jesus I am perfectly imperfect, and beautifully unique. Stage after stage, I will freeze, be terrified, and mess up, but I will keep trying until I get better. This is a journey, this is my life, not an hour and a half long film, and I'm so thankful for that.
Other Than That... :)
Other than that, Things are going really well! I'm ordering my singing program this week, and I've been practicing guitar and getting farther and father. I even have some baby calluses coming that I'm ridiculously proud of. ;)
Well, I'll see you all soon! God bless each and every your of you perfectly imperfect hearts, and remember to be brave enough to fail, so that you can learn to succeed. <3
~Arianna
